First off, I want to apologize for not getting a Wednesday Devotional up this past week. We were on our 2 day voyage back to Thailand from the States, so I wasn’t able to get one up. If you aren’t already, you should really check out my other series “Wednesday Devotional”. Check out my latest post here. Anyway, I am glad to have you joining us today for Mom Crush Monday! The guest post today is so good, just like all the past ones! Her story was very touching, and I hope you like it just as much as I do! Sara is talking about something I fear will come too quickly-the empty nest. Show her some love in the comments and follow along on Instagram with the hashtag #momcrushmonday every Monday! To read other awesome mom bloggers, make sure to come back here every Monday!
The Empty Nest
It felt like my heart was being crushed. That is how the emptiness first arrived.
Tears I never expected poured out.
I’ve always heard of the empty nest syndrome and choked it up to moms who can’t separate their identity from their child’s.
Here I am, crying my heart out. Feeling as though my child was yanked out of my heart.
I, for the first time in my son’s life, was not in control of where he slept, whom he spent his time with or even that he ate properly.
The empty nest syndrome can be likened unto grieving.
Before dropping my son off at the airport, I was numb. I knew the change was coming and disagreed with his choice. I let him go anyway.
Once we said goodbye and he boarded the plane, my heart sank. It was a physical pain akin to having an elephant (I think) standing on top of your chest.
I disconnected from life, spent a lot of time sleeping, comforting myself with carbohydrates and crying.
It may have been harder on me because my son moved over 2,000 miles away, just turned 18, and graduated high school.
It may have been harder on me because I let my son go knowing full well that the decision he just made might be a bad one. One he will regret. One that can possibly harm him.
Parenting is being responsible for another’s life, but, also, allowing that other life to slowly and eventually transform into a “separate but together” relationship.
You find that parenting isn’t just about guiding, but also about letting go. It is painful.
One year later my son returned home – broken, hurt, embarrassed and much wiser.
Am I happy about the fact that I was “right”? NO, no, no However, I’ve learned that even though something seems overwhelming, impossible and tragic, I (and my son) can get through it.
I didn’t die and neither did he and, believe me, there were times this overpowered any rational thought in my mind.
Children are a gift and a huge responsibility.
No matter how old they are, you, as their mother, will grieve. Learning how is the key to traveling this road we call motherhood.
Have you experienced a situational loss in your child’s relationship? How did you get through it?
Sara Duggan is a mom of 2 boys, 21 and 16, traveling the road of motherhood, growing pains and all. She’s a virtual assistant to business bloggers and writes about productivity and taming to-do lists.
Read her blog, follow her on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter and make sure to show her some love on each of these social media channels!